My Life is Lame

I want people to know that I’m sick.  Extremely sick.  Probably going to die soon.  Maybe by Sunday.  Around noonish. 

I have.  I can barely even say it.  It’s.  Well.  Writer’s block. 

I just don’t…

I can’t…

I have…

I want to say something, but don’t know how.

Honestly I think writer’s block is worse than being cock blocked because when you’re cock blocked you have two other options.  Left and right. 

I have so many ideas for topics to talk about, but all of them lead to no where. 

What kind of porn did Shakespeare watch?

How did Catdog poop?

Why is New York City obsessed with my hair?  ( On a side note, NYC is seriously obsessed with my hair.  Not a day goes by that I don’t get a compliment about how great my hair is.  The secret, is that I get out of the shower, and then push it out of my face. Eat it up NYC.  Eat it up.)

After writing that above paragraph I just stared at my computer for 5 minutes until I searched to see what the actresses name was who plays the evil queen on “Once Upon a Time.”  She was in 2 episodes of “LOST,” which makes me like her even more as a person than before.  She’s also the daughter of a former baseball player.  Go Wikipedia. 

Seriously though.  I’m losing it.  I guess one guy can only have so many drunk uncle stories before the drunk uncle story well goes dry. 

Seriously, there is not a drop left in that well.  

Maybe I haven’t mentioned God enough in my posts and so this is a punishment, but I thought that was what hell was far, so not cool God.  Not cool. 

Maybe I should just stop writing.  I have a full time job in the media.  The Broadcast media.  Who needs to write anymore anyways?  We can just watch everything. 

No.  I’m gonna keep at it.  I’m gonna keep finding awkward moments from my life/most likely yours because let’s admit, it if you’re reading this blog you’re a little Lame/awkward too. And why shouldn’t you be ya freak?

Now that I’ve insulted my readers I’m gonna get back to focusing on writing.  And by focusing on writing I mean watching TV.  And by watching TV I mean, seriously, I’m gonna be watching TV.  Just started “Downtown Abbey.”  Who knew PBS had non-boring shows.